Yesterday I watched the General Relief Society Meeting and was once again surprised by how much the messages were exactly what I needed to hear.
Sister Linda Reeves spoke about the story of Lazarus. She read a verse that specifically touched me: When Jesus therefore saw her weeping, and the Jews also weeping which came with her, he groaned in the spirit, and was troubled, (John 11:33). As she read this, I immediately thought of Josh. When the ultrasound lady told us that Nathan had died, I cried (a lot). Josh's reaction was different. I think describing it as his spirit groaning would have been accurate. He wasn't upset so much at the loss of a child as he was at watching me in so much pain.
I am so truly grateful to have a husband who loves me that much. I am so blessed to be able to see Christ-like attributes in him. I love that he is worthy to hold the Priesthood and can give me a blessing anytime I ask (even 3:00am). I know that he feels inadequate and helpless but I also know that I would never be able to get through this without him.